Memo to Self: Cut Back on the Caffeine
by slayidle
Summary: Written purely for my own enjoyment and possibly yours' too. PG13 for swearing and general insanity. Not a Mary Sue. XD
1. This is not a hallucination pinch

Memo to Self: Cut Back on the Caffeine  
  
Chapter One  
  
This is not a hallucination. *pinch*  
  
Type-ity-type-type went the keys on my keyboard as I wrote the beginning to yet another oen of the bizzare fanfics that seemed to be flooding my brainwaves lately.  
  
"You've been writing too many fanfics," a voice observed.  
  
I jumped at my computer and whirled around. To put it in layman's terms, I was quite shocked/surprised/weirded-out by the fact that one Mr. Pegasus J Crawford was sitting on my bed.  
  
"Buwa?" I gaped. This was not supposed to happen. Characters in anime that you write fanfics about are NOT supposed to show up in your bedroom at three in the morning.  
  
"You look very much like a fish out of water at the moment," he observed.  
  
I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. "This is what I get for being up too late. Hallucinations again. Like the time I swear Johnny Depp made me toast."  
  
"Actually, I'm quite real." Pegasus seemed to be getting some weird kick out of the fact that I was trying to hold my lingering sanity together. He tilted his head to the side, allowing the silver hair to move out of his face and the Sennen Eye to come into view.  
  
"Gods, that thing is freaky." I commented, then caught myself. I shook my head. "What am I doing? You're not real. This is some sort of wongo hallucination."  
  
"As I've said, Melody, I am quite real." Pegasus was still all-too amused by the situation.  
  
I, Melody Jung, took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Maybe the age-old 'If I can't see you, you're not there' would actually work for once. "Why are you here?"  
  
"There's been a general concensus among us all," Pegasus said. I opened my eyes and peered at him, slightly peeved. If he was going to continue talking, I wanted to watch him. So that he didn't try any freaky-deaky tricks with that Sennen Eye of his.  
  
"About what?" I asked, both suspicious and curious. "And who's us?"  
  
"Yuugi-boy, Kaiba-boy, Jounouchi, Bakura, Mai, a few others and myself," Pegasus said, pulling his legs up and settling in the Lotus position on my comfortor. "And it's about your fanfics."  
  
"What about my fanfics?" Instantly, I was defensive. "I mean, it's not like I've ever posted some of them."  
  
"Aah, but they still live on your harddrive and in your mind." Pegasus tapped the Sennen Eye. "And believe me, you have a rather warped imagination."  
  
"Hey, the Bakura slash Mokuba one was strictly experimental," I said. "And besides, I was dared to do it."  
  
"No matter," Pegasus waved that off. "However, there is a slight punishment in store for you."  
  
"A punishment?" Instantly, the eyebrows went up and the suspicion grew. "Not a punishment game, right?"  
  
"Oh, of course not." Pegasus laughed slightly. His face then became serious. "Your punishment is to enter our world - "  
  
"That doesn't seem like a punishment," I interjected, a feeling of amusement surfacing in my mind.  
  
Pegasus's rather freaky grin was back. "You can choose what to look like, what your name is and everything like that - you cannot have a Sennen Item though. Quite a few people have wanted those - "  
  
"You mean I'm not the only one being punished?" I interjected.  
  
"Jesus, no!" Pegasus laughed at that. "Many different fanfic authors are being punished this way."  
  
"Oh." Seemed about the only thing that I could think of to say.  
  
"And I will be you guide-like person during your stay." Pegasus added. "So, any preference on your looks, name or anything? Oh, and what time period would you like to be dropped into?"  
  
"Duellist's Kingdom," was my prompt response for that question. If I was going to enter the word of Yuugiou, I would be entering it damn near the beginning, thank you very much. As for everything else? I glanced over at the mirror and studied my reflection. After seeing the same blonde hair, pale skin and green eyes for sixteen years, I was pretty used to it. "I'll keep the way I look."  
  
"Most people opt for different looks," Pegasus replied.  
  
I shrugged. "I'm not most people."  
  
"Do you have a name picked out, or would you like to keep Melody?" Was the next question.  
  
"Eh, sure, I'll keep my name." I shrugged. Then an idea occured to me. "But I'll be damned if you let me go in there with only my current knowledge of Japanese. I demand to be fluent."  
  
"Of course," Pegasus replied. "Now, are you ready to go?"  
  
"Sure." I said, leaning back in my chair.  
  
There was a blinding flash of light and a feeling of intense "Ooooh, sheeeet" as my room vanished.  
  
When I could see again, I found myself on the stairs of a castle, wearing so not the clothes I had been before. There was a black skirt, knee-high black boots, a red tank top and a long, black leather duster upon my body. Sure, they were all clothes that were found in my closet, but I had never worn that certain combination before.  
  
I gaped down at my body. "I look like a hooker!"  
  
"No you don't," Pegasus said. I whirled around to see him beside me, holding out a glove. He grabbed my hand and shoved the glove onto it before I had time to react. "Now, you're all set."  
  
"Buwa?" I merely stared at the silver-haired loon.  
  
"There, go." He beamed. "Have fun, duel some people."  
  
"But I don't duel," I said, looking down at the glove that Pegasus had shoved over my hand.  
  
"Nonesense," Pegasus proclaimed, eyeing the purse draped over my shoulder. "I know for a fact that you have a very good deck."  
  
I raised an eyebrow. "That doesn't mean I know how to duel," I said. "I have no head for the rules. The just go whoosh!" I raised my hand and skimmed it over my head.  
  
"No matter, you can still duel people." Now, he had draped an arm around my shoulder and was leading me down the stairs.  
  
"Uhh . . . how about no?"  
  
"Oh, it'll be fun!" The scary grin was back.  
  
"No, it won't." I scowled back at Pegasus. "I'll lose. And I don't have fun at games where I lose."  
  
"So strategize," was the reply as we reached the bottom of the stairs. Pegasus gesticulated at the rest of the island. "There are plenty of duellists here. I'm fairly sure you can beat one."  
  
"Strategize?" I snorted. "I can't strategize my way out of a paper bag."  
  
"That is not true." Pegasus contradicted. He let his arm drop from my shoulders and then gave me a small push. "Go, duel."  
  
"But - "  
  
"You're not allowed back into the castle until you've had two duels. I don't care if you win or lose. If you win, I advise you to keep going." Pegasus called back as he began to walk back up the stairs to his castle.  
  
"I really don't like you at the moment." I folded my arms and glared.  
  
Pegasus stopped and turned back. He brushed his hair out of the way and tapped the Sennen Eye embedded in his skull. "I know."  
  
Childishly, I stuck my tongue out at him as he turned around again.  
  
"Have fun on your duels!" Those were his last words as he entered the castle. The main door swinging shut behind him sounded louder than it should have been.  
  
I made a sound half-way between a grumble and a sigh as I looked down at the two shiny gold starchips embedded into the metal bracelet part of the glove. Next, I eyed my purse. After a moment of that, I dug out my duelling deck. While thing thing had barely been useful in school, maybe it could be of some use now.  
  
With that semi-optimistic thought in my head, I set off in the direction of somewhere - heading away from the castle. I pondered the thought of sneaking in through one of the backways.  
  
"Oh, wait." I muttered sarcastically to myself. "He's probably listening in on my thoughts again."  
  
I sighed and continued along my chosen path, brightening a bit. After all, it was only a matter of time before I would run into other duellists. 


	2. Why one should not sing Vanilla loudly

Memo to Self: Cut Back on the Caffeine  
  
Chapter Two  
  
Why one should not sing Vanilla loudly.  
  
Note: If you don't know the translated lyrics, go to senshigakuen.com/translations/lyrics/gackt/vanilla.htm *cough, hack* And it's a great song. Gackt is teh r0xx0rz.  
  
"Kimi wa seijitsu na moralist, kirei na yubi de boku o nazoru. Boku wa junsui na terrorist, kimi no omou ga mama ni kakumei ga okiru," I was singing loudly and off-key as I walked. It had begun to get a little too quiet for my tastes and, as there was no other way to make noise, I was singing. Although if anyone else had been around, I probably would have promptly been told to shut the hell up. But, as there was no one around. . . . "Koi ni shibarareta specialist, nagai tsume o taterareta boku. Ai o tashikametai egoist, kimi no oku made tadoritsukitai. Kimi no kao ga toozakaru. Ah, boku wa boku de nakunaru mae ni!"  
  
I picked up speed as I walked, mentally viewing the live performance of 'Vanilla' in my head. Damn, the fanservice was great in it! "Aishite mo ii kai? Yureru yoru ni arugamama de ii yo! Motto, fukaku! Kuruoshii kurai ni nareta kuchibiru ga, tokeau hodo ni. Boku wa. . . kimi no. . . Vanilla!"  
  
"You know, it's very strange to hear a girl singing that song," a voice interjected.  
  
I yelped and spun around. I very muchly dislike people sneaking up on me. Which is why my glare was turned on the person who had interupted my loud singing.  
  
"And you're very off-key," the person added.  
  
I scowled at the girl who had interupted my singing. "And I believe that I did not ask your opinion, did I?"  
  
The girl looked rather taken aback at the nasty tone that had crept into my voice. "Well, someone's rather bitchy today."  
  
I rolled my eyes. "That's an understatement. By the way, I'm Melody."  
  
"I'm Miraino Hikari," the girl said.  
  
At her name, I did a double take. My eyes narrowed as I looked carefully at her. She had long, black curly hair, large violet eyes and looked like she had just stepped off of the pages of a fashion magazine. This, and her name made something in my brain click.  
  
"You're one of the ones being punished?" I inquired. Inside, I was shaking my head. Miraino Hikari. Light of the Future. Mein Gott, I was cringing at the obviously fangirl-ish name.  
  
"Haaaiii~" Hikari nodded, smiling gleefully. "You too?"  
  
"Uhh . . . " I began to inch away.  
  
"I mean, this doesn't seem like a punishment at ALL!" The over-enthusiastic girl continued. "I was able to pick my name, what I look like and any special abilities I have. I'm now a top-rank duelist and have telekinesis!"  
  
"That's nice," I nodded, looking around wildly for an escape route. Alas, there was none.  
  
"And I'll let you in on a little secret," Hikari said, still grinning like a mad thing.  
  
"Oh, really?" Unfortunately, she didn't notice the obvious lack-of-interest in my voice and on my face.  
  
"I'm going to make Kaiba Seto-chan fall in love with me!" Hikari finished, waiting expectantly.  
  
I raised an eyebrow. "If you call Kaiba-boy 'Seto-chan' to his face, he'll probably shoot you."  
  
Hikari seemed to pout.  
  
"As for me, I'm going somewhere. Away from you." I said, turning and walking off.  
  
"Not so fast!" The hyperactive fangirl's voice had turned hard and cold.  
  
"Oh, don't tell me she has an other half, too." I mumbled, stopping and turning around. "What now?"  
  
"I challenge you to a duel!" Hikari said, pointing dramatically.  
  
"Good for you," I said in a tone that one would use with a small child. "Regretfully, I must decline, for I am meeting Pegasus for tea this afternoon."  
  
With that as my final statement, I began to walk away from Hikari fast. As I walked, I shuddered and made a mental note to myself to NOT run into any more people being punished here. They were living out Mary Sue fantasies. Which meant, in a way, I was. Even though I don't write Mary Sues.  
  
I stopped, puzzled. Then I shook my fist up at the sky. "Curse you, cruel world!"  
  
"Why are you cursing the cruel world?"  
  
My eye twitched as I turned around, fully expecting to give this new person a piece of my mind. Especially if they were another one like Hikari. However, I froze with my mouth hanging open.  
  
Bakura Ryou was standing in front of me, looking slightly confused and concerned.  
  
"B-wah-g . . . Guh?" I finally managed to spit out and make myself look like a complete moron. Then I coughed, swallowed and pulled myself together. "You're Bakura Ryou," I stated.  
  
Way to be a moron, self. That was what my inner voice was mocking me with.  
  
"Yes, I am," Bakura looked somewhat confused. His eyes then narrowed slightly. I flinched, half-expecting his other, more homocidal half to jump out. "And you're Melody Crawford."  
  
Imagine my surprise at that. I swore that I heard Pegasus's gleeful giggles from the castle. I stopped and stared at Bakura. "What?"  
  
"That's right," the white-haired boy looked slightly proud. "Your Pegasus's niece, aren't you? I've seen you on television."  
  
My left eye was beginning to twitch again. Pegasus had some explaining to do. I did not request to be any bizarre relative. An awful thought occured to me then. Slowly, I pulled a few locks of hair into view.  
  
They were silver. A growl escaped my throat. He had messed with my appearance when I had said I liked the way I looked.  
  
"Excuse me, will you?" I inquired of Bakura. Before he had a chance to answer, I was all but running back in the direction of the castle.  
  
Oh, there was going to be pain. Lots of pain, inflicted on the inventor of the Duel Monsters game. Pain via hot pokers.  
  
As I walked, I wasn't really paying attention to anything. Which was probably why I was so surprised to bump into someone.  
  
"Ow!" Yelled 'Insector' Haga, the notorious Bug duelist.  
  
Once more, I glared at the sky.  
  
"Curse you, cruel world." I muttered again.  
  
"Hey, want to duel?" Haga's over-large, spectacle-covered eyes landed on the glove that I wore. I sighed.  
  
"Fine." 


End file.
